Pause the Menopause!



Well, I've had the weight and the midlife crisis blogs, so the menopause blog, a bit like the menopause itself, was inevitable! I love the above Pinterest quote of Cinderella. Bibbity bibbity boo! And this next quote, clearly reflecting mine and other women's indecisiveness. Apparently  it is our hormones. Ask anyone ordering from a menu with me!
"What are you having?" I always need to know because I always want what the other is having. ALWAYS!



Another blog where there's that much to say, I don't where to start! So I'll start with a song! This song brings back memories of the 18 year old me being at a party and two lovely ladies singing along to Tina Turner,
"Women of a certain age, ..."
This image and the way these two ladies of a certain age grabbed life, has stuck with me, until I am now their age myself. Or nearly! The 18 year old me thought it would take much longer to get here though!


So what is the menopause? The word itself makes me think of the older times of Jane Austen. I can just see one of her female protagonists (big word alert) saying to the comedic male characters who get their comeuppance:
"Men, oh pause. For pity's sake. Show some decorum!"
In fact, I think that would have slotted right into one of Austen's novels pretty well!
Thinking about it seriously, the authors steered away from PMT, hormones and the menopause, they're quite modern concepts. I think Austen covered them, but it was seen differently.
I love playing with words. The men-oh-pause reminds me of the massively funny Mike Myers when he was a poetry rapper on stage and just said,
"Woman- woe man!"
Love Mike Myers!

Here comes the science bit!
So there's not just the menopause, apparently there is a peri menopause, or a pre. Because, you know, the menopause is obviously not enough for us to go through that we need a pre and a post experience thrown in too! When our estrogen levels decline, the three main symptoms, although there's probably about 20, are:
1. Hot flushes and sweats
2. Brain fog and lack of focus and concentration
3. Already forgotten it. Seriously!
That's it! Anxiety.

Never mind the Science definition, I like this one! It really made me laugh! Perhaps I'd swap the Sam Elliot for Tom Hardy though!



I will never forget a fab work friend reflecting on her menopausal experience. She was such a funny story teller and often had me in stitches. There are some people you really miss working alongside and she is definitely one of them. But I digress! She basically said she went to the doctors and asked him why women, when they'd done with their 'bits' couldn't just have a lever at the back of their necks, like action men with their Eagle eyes. When they moved the lever, their 'bits' fell out! Oh, the way she told it; she had me in stitches! This action Wonder woman on Pinterest would be perfect!



Science bit over, here comes the funny pictures and quotes from Pinterest! I think the first thing to post, is the flushes. Although, in these quotes, they are flashes, which in my mind is something totally different! As shown in this picture!


Oh yes! Every window needs opening in every room, even in Winter on a cold, December day!


Looking at this next list, I need to cut out all four. What's left to eat or drink then?


Oh my goodness! Here comes, to me, the most important bit. Those blooming hormones! I've struggled with these darlings for the last ten years; they definitely have a lot to answer for! I have had a hormone test but the results came back normal.
1. What is considered normal?
2. One test on one day. What about the other 30 days of the month?
3. Surely the test got mixed up and they aren't my results.
4. Just ask my husband. He can tell you more about my hormones than any blood test!


And this next one! Oh yes. The insomnia creeps up on you slowly then grips you. I do always try and look on the bright side though and at least I can spend this time browsing through my beloved Pinterest and writing my blog!


From my extensive reading of Grazia, the best women's magazine under the sun, I've learned loads of useful health and mindfulness tips from the experts. Whether I've followed any of these is another thing! I loved one of the latest articles about boosting our brain power. It was called 'Give yourself a boost!'And not meaning the chocolate bar!It was very interesting and advised readers to take brain boosting supplements. The best part, for me was the positive slant on my fave drink coffee! Apparently we need caffeine on a daily basis because it is a nootropic. As advised by a Greek pschycoloist in 1972. The word derives from
Nous for mind and Trepein to bend or turn. I'm liking the works of this pschycoloist!



Seriously though, caffeine is good for you, in small amounts. Like everything I suppose! When I was diagnosed with migraines and had auras lasting for 3 to 4 days, I'd become immune to tablets, my hubby researched pain relief on t'internet. He found a Swiss psychologist who stated the three main ingredients for migraine relief were caffeine, aspirin and paracetamol. All found in Amazon Extra. He ordered a box full and I have not looked back. I did freak out slightly when I saw the box in the recycling bin with all white powder in the bottom. What will the neighbours think we've been buying? We'll, they already think I'm pregnant. By now, after a year, they must know I'm just over weight!
Back to the article. In addition, the article went on to say we need cognitive enhancers to boost memory, focus and learning. They looked at different natural remedies and the 'Boost' capsules to lift you, the 'Edge' to focus and the 'Zzzzs' to sleep were all recommended. You can get them in health stores. Basically, products with caffeine, magnesium, zinc and ginseng are all amazing for us women of an age! The reporter said the capsules she recommended were like having a matcha tea without the jittery coffee buzz. You just got the clear thinking effect. These happy foods are good too!



Matcha tea. Have you tried it? I've been given a demonstration on now to make it properly at Have it coffee rooms in town, but never tried it. It was made in a bowl and the idea is to drink it straight down, like a big shot!



I've kind of cheated and had a matcha flavoured 4 finger Kit Kat which was gorgeous! Matcha is so healthy and gives you a natural kick. When I looked on Pinterest, you can get so many different matcha products, not just tea. I think I may have to try the matcha donuts I saw on pinterest!



Back to the menopause! I've seen it with my own eyes and I'll admit, I'm not looking forward to it! We're all different but I just get the feeling I'm going to get the whole works; I really don't do things by halves! We have to embrace it, knowing there is always gin. And chocolate! I know some of you will read this and will be able to tell me more about the menopause! Let me know if gin and chocolate helped! Perhaps something stronger than gin was needed!
Our bodies cha he so much in this time. I mean, whoever coined 'the middle aged spread weren't wrong. It makes me envisage spreading a load of dripping over a slice of bread! It's years since I've been a pear shape and now, appsrently Im an apple shape. More Granny Smith than Golden Delicious!


I love this next quote.


I'll leave you with this last quote from Pinterest that made me laugh!







Comments

  1. Very funny you should definitely write a book!!!

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    Replies
    1. Aww thankyou! I've started one so watch this space!

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