Recovering people pleasers unite!


Love this quote for November. Make it No vember. Think before you jump in and offer to do something or say yes to doing something. If no sounds too harsh, try a we'll see for starters!
This next quote really got me thinking. I do love my rhyming words but yes. I do believe I, and other friends and family, have been suffering from the very common disease to please. Absolutely! And I need to take drastic action! When you suffer from this disease, there are so many negative side effects such as burning yourself out, missing out on what you want, offending others and so on. I need some antibiotics and soon!


This next quote is so clever. It can't possibly be me because I pull far too many faces but it shows you how us people pleasers sometimes don't show our true feelings or speak our mind's and stand up for our beliefs for fear of offending or causing conflict. Instead of letting what we need to out, it is bubbling away dangerously, underneath the surface. Then we end up taking it out on those we are comfortable with and when we get home. The times I've plastered my smile on and used my broken record phrase of, "it's ok", then walked in the house, throwing my bags down, slamming the kettle on, chucking a tea bag in the cup and stirring my tea like there's no tomorrow! All the while, chuntering to yourself about the day's events while hubby longers near the door, assessing whether to enter. Yet people at work think you're fine. I know I'm not on my own here!


It is true people pleasers don't want to let folk down or disappoint them. And that is lovely up to a point. You need to remember yourself in this equation. But you don't. Instead, you end up trying your hardest, changing your schedule or your plans to suit others. I am realising sometimes you have to say you can't do something. Then it's up to the other party how they react to that.

So, I've decided to think before I agree with something and check how it will affect me and my plans first. I just need to check if that is ok with everyone though!
I think it's also about balancing out who you choose to please. Remember those people over the years who you've just done stuff for but it's not always been a two way street. Remember those who have helped you. Their opinions count, not the others.


I've just covered feeling guilty im another blog and some people will take advantage of this. It's those folk who take a mile when you've only given an inch. If you keep letting them, they will continue. If we set boundaries, people will know how far to push and a lot will actually respect you more for saying you don't agree with something.


There will always be those people who just expect things of you. Once this happens, a lot of the appreciation for what you do goes too.



This next quote is so important. You are impirtant.


It is impossible to spread your support and help so thinly as to please everyone, so don't even try. You know the ones who deserve it deep down.


I love this quote. Although, I would have to say a jar of marmite or a bottle of chilled Chardonnay wine!


We do learn so much about ourselves as we are getting older. This next quote most definitely! With some people you can't do right for doing wrong. And whatever you do, if your face does not fit, your actions won't either. Sad, but very true.


So, I am unleashing it. My inner marmite is ready to come out of the jar! It's knowing some people will not take to you; you may be too salty, too much! That's fair enough. Be with people who crave your company, feel bettee for seeing you and appreciate you.


This next quote is pretty deep but my goodness, so true. We put the bars around ourselves. Our thoughts and fears of what people will think of us stop us doing things or behaving in certain ways. We need to free ourselves from this. Just BE.


At the same time as not worrying about pleasing as much and not saying yes to everything everyone wants and expects of us, we need to remember the power of yes still. We need to know what to embrace and what opportunities to say yes to. I love this quote. Start saying yes more for you. See where it takes you!




Comments

  1. It's not selfish to say No. Say Yes if you can otherwise You come first. Do what is best for you and yours. It's your Life.

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